Most of the time I try to stay positive. Most of the time I try to simply find some sort of bright side or silver lining. And usually I can.
I’ve worked out every day this week. Gym 6 times, running 3 times. Eaten pretty healthy (or at least I thought so, definitely healthier than I had been). I could feel the changes (my muscles weren’t as tight, my knees didn’t hurt quite as much). I knew I was doing it right.
But today, seriously, what the fuck? I mean, really?!?! I decided I should go ahead and get on the scale since it had been a week. I wasn’t expecting much change. Just a little, maybe, to let me know I was moving in the right direction. I know I am moving in the right direction. But do you know what ISN’T moving in the right direction? The damn scale. Because somehow, after all my hard work, I am UP two pounds. So, I ask you again, WHAT THE FUCK?
I try not to let the numbers on the scale define me. I try to tell myself to look at the overall picture. Clothes are getting loser, energy level is going up, runs have become a lot easier (still hard, but easier than when I first started). I *know* I am moving forward. I know I am moving in a positive direction. I know the numbers on the scale don’t paint the whole picture. But come on. Help me out a little. Give me something tangible, something in “writing” to show me I am doing a good job.
I’m not going to let this moment define my day like I would have a long time ago. I’m not going to give up and think “why bother now” like I would have a long time ago. And that’s progress. I know that’s progress.
But really, come on!