“It’s lack of faith that makes people afraid of meeting challenges, and I believe in myself.” ~Muhammad Ali
So, I guess this could be considered my obligatory New Years Resolution post. I could bore you with my endless downpour of yearly recycled resolutions (drink less, eat more vegetables, be a nicer wife, be a better mother, etc.) but I won’t. These are the same hundred or so plans that I make every year and every year I feel like a failure when I still occasionally suck at being a mom, when I still occasionally yell at my husband for no apparent reason, when I still occasionally have one too many glasses of wine, and when I still occasionally choose party mix over carrots.
And somehow, when I keep making the same resolutions year after year, I wonder why nothing changes; why I’m still depressed more than I’m happy, why I’m still not at the weight or fitness level that I want to be, why my home life is not as wonderful as it could be. Part of this, of course, is that I never put forth enough effort. For about two weeks I do everything in my power to change what I think needs to be changed, and then when things do change, I stop putting forth any effort and slack off…and things tend to go back to sucking. Shocking, I know.
Which is why, this year, I’m making monthly resolutions as opposed to yearly ones. I’m hoping that this way I can keep things fresh, change things up when I need to, evaluate what’s working and what’s not, tweak and add and subtract when needed. Also, I’ll be able to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I tend to loose focus or get discouraged or simply become complacent when I have too long to complete something. And, of course, there is the procrastination aspect as well. Why do today what you can do tomorrow instead?
A resolution, simply put, is the firm idea to do or not do something. I guess, these ideas that I have for the month of January aren’t really resolutions so much as they are challenges and goals…things I am hoping to accomplish, though in the strict sense of the word I am resolute about accomplishing them.
So, long story short, each month I’ll come up with some sort of theme that encompasses the things I want to accomplish and at the end of the month evaluate how I did and make up new goals (or keep the same goals) for the next month.
January’s theme is simple: Take yourself seriously. You are important. So many times I decide I can’t do things simply based on what other people would say if they found out I was doing them. If I want to be a runner, I will. If I want to learn a new language, I’ll do it. If I want to dye my hair green, so be it. Sometimes it’s ok to be selfish about things you want, especially if it will make you a better person in the long run. And for those people who will judge, or be jealous, or try to bring you down, screw them. I’ve got too much other crap going on. I don’t need any added negativity.
January’s Goals and Challenges
1. Run 3-4 days a week
2. Be able to run 3 miles by the end of January
3. Complete the planking, squats, and pushup challenge (on pinterest)
4. Give up diet coke
1. Take the opportunity to write at least twice a week
2. Read 2 new books
3. Learn a different knitting stitch than the only one that know
1. NO cellphone, ipad, computer after 9:30 pm unless an emergency (or reading a book on the ipad, as I wind up downloading most of them). No more mindless surfing and time wasting.
2. Do something scary each week: call someone on the phone, wear my running pants without feeling the need to hike shorts over them simply because I’m self conscious, etc.
3. Make an effort to be more world-conscious: shop more at local businesses, stop being so wasteful, etc.
4. Stop being so damn angry all the time: at my students, at my own kids, at my husband, at friends who have let me down. I need to stop carrying this baggage every where I go. It’s not solving any problems.
Honestly, these don’t seem so unreasonable (except maybe the diet coke :).
I know I can do it and I know there are people out there who will support me in this endeavor, and really, support me anything I decide to do. And those are the people I really need to keep around.