I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately.
I’m completely unmotivated to do anything. I pack my gym bag and then skip out. I lay out my running clothes and then say forget it.
Why did I let myself get to the starting over point again? It’s so hard to be here. To see all my hard work gone. To have my 3 miles feel like 30. The numbers on the scale are climbing with my mile time. I cry way more than I should. I’m literally at the “what’s the point?” place and I can’t seem to find my way out.
I have a half marathon coming up in 12 weeks and I just don’t care. I don’t seem to care about a lot of things lately…especially if they take extra effort and energy. Once I put the kids to bed I am comatose on the couch.
I’ve become mean. And spiteful. And judgey. AND I HATE IT.
I’ve got to be in here somewhere. I don’t know this person. I don’t want to know this person.